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Love | How to use the power of love

LOVE | How to use the power of love
Almost everyone wants to know what is love. I am sure you also want to know, is not it!" But they can not get a satisfactory answer because they all experience it in different manner in their life and also feel the sensation of it. So they are confused as the theoretical knowledge and their practical experience of love do not match.
But nothing to worry friends because today in this article LOVE I am going to give you a simple and true definition of love which will clear all your doubts and you will able to enjoy it and it's power properly.






What is love
Like anger and fear LOVE is also a pure emotional feeling. The only difference is anger and fear are not our desire, but love is our desire.  This is why we can understand anger and fear easily but we can not understand love easily. And it is because of our desire for it. We have our own imagination and believe for love based upon our desire for it so we can not see it as it is. 
Are you confuse…

Good parent vs True parent

GOOD PARENT VS TRUE PARENT


good-parent-true-parent
good-parent-true-parent



To be a parent is the sweetest gift of god. Every married couple want to be the parent of their own baby. But if you will see the real responsibility of a parent then it is very very difficult. Most of people think they have done their duty as a parent. Even they think that they are doing their responsibility properly as a parent. But do you think it is true! Today in this article Good parent vs True parent, I am going to briefly explain the difference between both of these two. I will explain here how to deal with these responsibilities and how to be a true parent rather than to be a good parent only. So keep reading.

Unfortunately maximum parents are although able to be a good parent but they are not able to be a true parent. I know it is little confusing, but to understand it first understand what is parenting.






What is parenting?


It is no matter from which social class you belong but the motive for parenting is equal for everyone. That is, to give a happy and successful life for their children with real love. But in real world it is not happening. Maximum parents are able to make their children successful although their children are not happy in their life. Then what is the reason behind it? Can it is said that they are true parent? Unfortunately not, off course they are very good parent but they are fail to give their child a happy life. And your parenting can be accept successful only when your child will live a happy life with full of freedom, self satisfaction and respect because you are the gardener of the life of your child and if they are not happy then definitely there is your mistake too. It is because you are mature and it is your responsibility to direct them correctly. From childhood in which direction you will make him/her to go, he/she will achieve things according to that. What ethical character you build in them are the actual base of their whole life. So this should be the main motive of parenting rather than to teach them only how to be a money making machine. Because in the worst situation money will not able to return your happiness to you. It is your character which will help you to bounce back and win the challenges. That means you should give priority to build a very good character of your child rather than to teach them only earning skills. But unfortunately most of the parents are very careless about the character building of their child as they have no awareness that happiness is the outcome of good character.





Off course all parents want to do it for their child and whatever they decide and do for their child are for their overall development. But do you ever think that what ways you are showing to your child is right or not? Are you properly teach them or not? Because if you show them the right way and they follow you then it is next to impossible for them to live an unhappy and painful life. That means something is definitely wrong there. Let's understand it below with two different processes of parenting.





Good parent


Who they are actually good parents are cautious about the needs of their child. They try to fulfill all the needs of their child. Then they try to build the career of their child. They take all the burden for the higher studies of their child. They make disciplines for their child and even they force their child to follow them to build a very good career and future. They always try to take good and right decision for their child for his/her life and always pray to god for the happiness of their child. So no doubt they are very good parents. Now let's understand what is a true parent.





Parenting-tips
Parenting tips






True parent


Either this or that whatever human beings do is finally to get happiness. Even no one earn money to be unhappy. And I can challenge that no parents will want to sell the happiness of their child for any amount of wealth. But unfortunately somehow in real world it is happening. I am a life counsellor and everyday I talk a lot of people who are financially successful, they have big jobs or business, respect in society, have their own good relations, although they are unhappy. And this is because they learned from their parents, teachers and society the art of earning money but not the art of how to be happy in life. There is no fault by them. It is the fault of their parents and others who never taught them how to get happiness in life. Off course they are good parents but somehow they are unable to teach their child the art of happiness. So in this sense all the teachings and sacrifices are worthless if your child is not happy in his/her life. But it is not the fault of parents too, actually they themselves do not know how to be able for happiness. Even most of them are not happy in their life then how they will teach to their children the art of happiness.

But in other hand true parents know the real meaning of life and happiness. So they not only teach their children how to fulfill their needs but also teach them how to be able to live a happy life always. This is a very big and important subject to understand. Actually there is a huge difference between true parent and good parent.




Let me explain it a little bit. True parents not only make their child to achieve success in career, relations or society, but they actually make their child to achieve success from inside of them and then follow their happiness to build that as a base where all other things will be build by themselves. They never ask their children to follow material success, they actually ask their children to be a person whom all the material success will be follow. Still if you have problem to understand then do not worry, in the next part of this article I am going to make you understand with very easy ideas and techniques to give a happy life to your children.





best-parent
Best parent




How to be a true parent?


The 5 most important pillars of life on which all the happiness of life depends are :-
  1. Career
  2. Health
  3. Character
  4. Habits
  5. Importance of emotions.

1) career


No doubt career  Is the back bone of life. So it is natural for parents to be more cautious about the career of their child.  But the mistake here they do is to chose a career for their child by their choice and also think that it will give their child all happiness. Give me an answer. If your children wants to be a writer or dancer but you always motivate and force him/her to be a doctor then do you think he/she will be happy in his/her life? We all know a person will never be happy when he/she does not get the career of his/her choice. Let's take your example. If you are an artist and someone will be forcefully make you a government worker then will you be happy? Off course not! Because career is the main activity of life and how one can be happy by doing a work 8-10 hours everyday which he/she does not love

Off course money is the motive but who says your child will not able to get money by that work what he/she loves to do! Now a days you can earn money by every genuine activity or way. And that money will give your child real happiness. The only think is you have to support your child and help them to build a career in that work.  Suppose your child loves to do paintings then you can help and support him/her to be a great artist or a art teacher. No career is bigger than another. If you do the work of a barber with passion then you can earn more than a doctor or engineer. If you search then you will find barbers who earn more than 5-10 lakhs in a month. You can earn huge amount from any work now a days. The only thing needed is passion. And as a parent you can make your child's hobby into his/her passion. It is not difficult. When I was working as a teacher in my coaching center at that time I was making the hobbies of my students as their passion and they were make me proud by achieving great success in those. Then definitely you can also do it as a parent.



And in other hand if a doctor or engineer is not passionate for his/her work then it is guarantee that he/she will loose his/her position one day. With that he/she will loose all money, reputation, respect and everything. Because you can not make any one's career as his/her passion, but yes one can make his/her passion as career. 
So as a parent do not try to chose the career of your child. Just focus on their day to day educational, ethical, intellectual and character growth. Make sure that they will gain all the knowledge and let them to chose their career. Trust me your child will able to chose the right career in the right time. You just give him/her right guidance and support. Because in this way there is maximum possibility of their success and no chance of failier. Somehow if any then also their will be no regret in their heart and they will be happy and thankful to you always for supporting them to make their happiness as their career. And I am sure as a parent you want this love from your child.

This is the difference between a good parent and a true parent. Good parents think they can decide the best for their child. But true parents make their child such a way that he/she will take the best decision of his/her life. Motive is same but the ways to get that are different.


Good-parent-vs-true-parent
How to guide your child




2) Health


Health is the most important thing of life. It is not only the base of physical happiness but also the base of psychological happiness. Perhaps you may not aware but every kind of feelings like love, anger, frustration, sadness, depression are the results of different kind of chemical reactions of our body. Without a good health your brain also does not work properly. And if the brain of your child will not work properly then it is sure he/she will not able to compete in today's world and achieve his/her desired goal.

But unfortunately most of the parents are very careless about the physical and mental growth of their child. They only cautious about the studies of their child. Do not you think by avoiding the health and fitness we are actually spoiling the future and happiness of our children? It may possible that they will be rich in future but where they will use their money! Off course in medication and also will suffer by physically, mentally, may be by relationship and society too. Then how our children will be happy? Without a good health and fitness they will never able to enjoy their whole life physically and psychologically.

So as a true parent you should be give priority to the health and fitness of your child first. 30 minuets for fitness everyday will give your child a huge return in life. Make a habit in your child to be fit always from childhood. Once he/she will be habituate for it then he/she will automatically aware for health and fitness throughout his life. Trust me it will the biggest gift by you to your child and they will be very much thankful to you. Also it will make them more energetic and strong by physically and mentally which will make their life easy and full of happiness.


3) Character

Do you know what is the magical power for a human being to get success in each and every matter of life? That is character friends!" Yes it is!" Character is not only related to love matters. In real words character means the ability of yourself to deal with different matters and happenings of life. It no matters how educated you are, it only matters what character you have. To understand it you can read my real life story to know how I use it practically. The top most successful people have the lowest educational qualifications. Even most of them have no higher degrees. But they have a great character. 

It is because life have not a compulsory plan to challenge you.It will through different type of challenges to everyone. Then how similar type of degrees will give you success because challenges will be definitely different by time to time and person to person. That means to win the challenges of life you need a super power in your child and that is character.

That means you need to teach your child how to win. How to handle critical situations in life. How to have patience in life and how to achieve the goals. What is the importance of behavior in life  and also how to learn. And a lot of things like this which creates a great character in a child. And if once your child will be master in these qualities then it does not matter that what challenges life will through to them, they will definitely win that. Because there is no guarantee that the degrees of your child will have the same value after 20 years. But the character of your child will have the same value always. For example before 40 years when you got 60% in matriculation exam then you got a managerial job. But now if you will go with a 60% matriculation degree then no one will give you a peon's job also. Because time is changing everything very fast.


This is why I am asking you to build the character of your child rather than to force them to get degrees, because character is the degree which one you get from the university of life. And if your child have this degree of character then it is guaranteed that he/she will achieve success in every field of life and will enjoy the happiness always. No matter whatever problems about career or other matters of life he will face, but he can easily get a solution of that. But in other hand there is no guarantee that your child will surely get a job by that degree, even after an few time that degree is just for show off only, no value. So build a world class character in your child for guaranteed happy life of him.


Good-parent,true-parent
Good parent vs True parent

4) Habits

Habits are the foundation of life. Success and happiness in every field are the results of good habits. If your child have high degrees and big jobs but he/she have a lot of bad habits like laziness, alcoholic, unfriendly, dis respectful for others, carelessness, dishonest for others etc then no doubt all success will spoil very soon or even those are there then also he/she will suffer by a lot of social and other reasons. Use little common sense to understand it and you will get a lot of examples around you in this society. We never like these kind of persons and there is not any kind of support socially or psychologically for them. In other words we have no love, respect for these kind of people which are very important in life. 

So if you only focused about the career and money making ability for your child but not aware about his/her good habits then sorry to say but it is the work of an investor not of a parent. Because true parents want to build a strong and attractive personality in their child and that is only possible when you will make good habits in your child. I know it will be difficult for maximum parents to accept but if your children are unhappy in their life then the root cause is you. Excuses can give but it is a fact my friends. So if we want to give a happy life to our children they we have to accept our mistake and have to take the responsibility without any selfish reason.


5) Importance of emotions

Relations are like the life jackets of life. When ever we find big problems in life, only our true relatives help and support us. And the base for relations are emotions. Also from all these relations the most important is life partner. Almost 60% happiness of our life is depends on it. But do we teach anything related to these matters seriously to our children now a days?" Off course not! This is why marriage and love relations are changing as the meaning of pain and unhappiness. As a counsellor when I talk with males, females or couples then I notice that they have no idea about the importance, responsibility or meaning of marriage or other relations. They are trained from childhood to focus on money, career and profits. This is why they do not care about any relations and not even for their old parents. Tell me whose fault is this? If you are trained to focus money by any means then definitely you will focus money always. Is not it? Remember human mind is also a computer. And once you feed it with some information then it will work according to that. Common sense should be feed from childhood. Feelings, love, care, respect should feed from childhood in your children. Otherwise no doubt one day when you will expect these from your child then you will disappointed and suffer a lot specially in old age. In other words you will get what you will plant.

So friends, put good things in the mind of your children to get good things in return for you, for themselves and for others. Unfortunately parents are preparing their children only for material happiness. They have forget to teach their children about real happiness. But real life is based on real happiness and material happiness is only a shadow of happiness. We all realize it in life and I am sure you will be agree with me. So friends, from now be a true parent in place to be a good parent.

Conclusion

By this article I have tried to explain the real meaning and responsibilities as a parent. It is not difficult to fulfill all the material needs and requirements of children. Put that is not only the expectation from parents. Actually you should be a true parent rather than to be only a good parent. You should make able your child from physically, mentally, intellectually, financially, socially and also emotionally. Motivate your children rather than to demotivate them. Children needs emotional support but unfortunately most of the parent do exact opposite things. So first understand the actual meaning of parenting before being a parent. 




Will be continued
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